35 feels so faraway from 22

Back in college, I used to love a song by Switchfoot called "Let That Be Enough". Particularly because around February 16, I would play it over and over because of this lyric:

It's my birthday tomorrow

No one here could know

I was born this Thursday

22 years ago

Who was I at 22? 22 was a good year. It was my last year at Biola. I had stretched myself entirely too thin and cemented friendships and a career path by then. I threw one of the most ambitious events I'd ever put on and I was optimistic albeit naive about what was to come. I didn't think too far into the future then, I just wanted to survive to May, get Clyde Cook to shake my hand while dressed in a cap & gown and head out into the world and do whatever I was gonna do. 

Tomorrow I will be cough, cough, ack, thirty five. Thirty five is so old. We used to think 30 was old but yikes, 35, that's just five away from 40 and that's insanely old. By all accounts, I'm a total 100% certified fresh grown-up. A wife, mother, home owner, career lady. About to have a second baby and pretty. darn. happy. Grateful. Blessed. And I dunno where life goes from here but I am optimistic albeit naive about what's to come.

I remember playing that song over and over and it became such an anthem for the rest of my life. Above all, God's child be I 22 or 35 or 55. Just a kid who knows she's needy.

And I feel stuck

Watching history repeating

Yeah, who am I?

Just a kid who knows he's needy

Let me know that You hear me

Let me know Your touch

Let me know that You love me

And let that be enough