Well we finished with distant learning! This is not the way I imagined my daughter's first year of public school ending. I don't think millions of parents around the world imagined their kids teacher would be dropping off their end of the year items in a paper bag wearing a mask. It was so sad.
But of course, since I am me, I had to find a way to make it a little more fun so I made little graduation hats and diplomas and had a little graduation ceremony for them. I finally came to terms with the fact that Alice missing out on Kindergarten was personally traumatic to me. Growing up, home wasn't always the safest place so school was a haven and having it yanked away from Alice triggered some deep pain. I spent the last week of school crying/grieving and working on projects to funnel the pain toward something positive and to put a cap on the season of school. We did it!
As far back as I can remember I always loved summer. Maybe because it signifies fun and sun and just doing whatever you feel like doing and doing it outside. Maybe because it always meant that I was done with school, I could sleep in, and I would spend the sunny days reading, listening to good tunes, and hanging out at home, going on trips, and going out with friends. I've always loved summer and this one was hard to get excited about because I have been unable to think very much into the future as preservation. I've lowered my head and focused on school and surviving and not much else. It's honestly been darn near impossible to focus on anyone or anything but this household and myself. My priorities have been simple as simple can be and I dared not think of what's next because nobody knows and I don't want to drive myself crazy trying to figure it out. I only bit off what I could chew which is VERY DIFFICULT for me, I pack things on and on and therapy has really made me take the step back off that crazy ledge.
There is one project that is larger that will require my spouse and his father or mine to help us and it is building a patio cover over this part of the back yard which it desperately needs and always has. The only way to make it tolerable to sit here is to host events when the sun is starting to set or already has.
Digging for photos of this area had me find photos of the days when people would come hang out in our backyard. Remember that?!
This is my favorite of the patio cover options that I've browsed online. It's simple, modern, a tad farmhouse but not too much. Matt and I want one overhead light/fan under there instead of all these cool hanging lights. But I do love the hanging plant and swing idea. Definitely into it.
Don't worry, I will make time to just enjoy the summer time with the family.
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