Tuesday, May 26, 2015

where you been?

Yikes. Didn't mean for all this time to go un-blogged. Not much has been going on. I was home for an unexpected six weeks and then got a tiny 1 day stage shoot that was the easiest job of my life which I finished today and back to being unemployed. During that time we mostly hung out at home but there were activities nearly every weekend including this weekend marking the beginning of summer time. We played softball as a family and I managed to avoid embarrassing the Fredrich name by getting three hits, scoring three runs, and getting an out!
This little tyke has gotten pretty predictable except for a few nights of waking up at midnight crying for no reason we can determine other than probably teething. Goes to bed from 8-9, wakes up at 7:30/8, naps between 9:30/11 and 2:30/4 for an hour-two each. She's getting two top teeth and they seem to be bothering her more than when she got the bottom ones. She's waving, clapping, crusing along the furniture at LIGHTNING speed, standing unassisted, and taking teeny baby steps when she feels like it and we prop her into standing. I can't believe we're at this phase already, the walking phase. I've taken it day by day and that's helped me not feel so overwhelmed but it's hard to imagine that soon she'll be wearing shoes not just to amuse her mother but because she'll need them.
I'm also sorry to say that we are no longer breastfeeding. I wanted to make it to a year but I made it about 8 months exclusively breastfeeding, 9 months partly supplementing, and 10 months totally on formula. I wasn't a very responsible pumper and no matter what supplements I took or how much water I drank my supply just kept dipping and dipping and I just couldn't keep up. If I would have tried a little harder while I was home with her for so many weeks maybe we could have turned it around. For awhile I was able to nurse her for her first nap and right before bed but then my supply dipped really low and she would get frustrated about how long it took to get going and how little she was getting and I took the easy way out and just gave her formula. I was sorta beating myself up about it but Matt kept telling me how proud he was of how long I was able to do it and I am grateful I was able to do it at all. She is really healthy though, hasn't been sick yet. But now there's all these reminders around the house that just make me sad I'm no longer giving her the really good stuff. Bye bye pump. Bye bye nursing pads. See you for the next baby, if there is one.
On the other hand, she is eating a lot of food. We've been letting her feed herself for months now and we sit at the table and whatever we're eating I just cut up into baby bite sizes for her. I still have not convinced her to eat an egg but like a good vegetarian she loves tofu, tempeh, and quinoa.
So that's us. Or well, that's Alice, which is our whole life lets be honest. We are two months away from her first birthday and we're still hoping to make it to Austin for the 4th of July. I'm not gonna have some crazy elaborate birthday party for her because let's be real, she's not gonna remember. Hard to believe that it's been almost a year already. Someone stop this crazy train.

Tuesday, May 12, 2015

the master bathroom is not embarassing anymore

The good thing about DIY projects is once it's done you don't gotta do it anymore. So thankfully it's good enough for now and it's actually pretty likeable.
It wasn't without it's pains in the butt. Once the walls were painted it took all the color right out of the room and the plan was to paint the bottom cabinet blue to add color and that worked pretty well.
The bottom cabinet color I originally chose was Hale's Navy which is a beautiful color but was too purple and grey for me. So I did a quick research and went with Champion Cobalt and it was just what I was imagining.
The first thing I'd purchased were these brass handles and they're a straight steal from some blogger's kitchens I'd seen. I installed the first set using measurements and it was tricky and no good. Then I made a guide and that saved the day. If you ever have to install cabinet hardware, definitely make a guide. Time saver, life saver.
I wanted a fancy soap pump and couldn't find anything I loved so I went with a classic graphic soap pump that once the fancy stuff runs out we'll just refill with the cheap stuff. 
After buying and returning about four to five different bath rugs I ended up with yellow, predictably.
I wanted a shelf above the toilet to display things and that was a whole other rigamarole. Too big, too small, too grey. Ended up flipping a ledge I already had. Oh well.
I carefully chose the photo of Alice for her dad.
We got new towels that are nice and big and white and soft. Nate Berkus for Target.
I had ordered chrome hardware but then realized on grey walls it would just be too stark so I went with champagne bronze instead to warm it up. 
Brass-ish but modern. The stupid toilet roll holder was missing a crucial screw to keep it on the wall so I'm waiting for that to come in and that's been an ordeal and a half.
I mentioned before that I'd bought two medicine cabinets but accidentally bought the wrong size but since the sink is a single having only one in the middle looks pretty good.
It's amazing how much you can fit in these suckers.
And this is just funny to me. My side:
Matt's side. Men have it so easy.
Having it in the center leaves room on the side to eventually add some sconces of sorts, we definitely could use some more lighting. 
Leftover Mother's Day blooms make everything pretty.
Now we won't be embarrassed when I give a house tour! 

Tuesday, May 5, 2015

master bath: now it's the little things

Awhile ago I mentioned that I was itching to do something, anything to update the master bathroom. It started innocently enough with just wanting to get medicine cabinets and then since everything was off the wall I thought well, we should just paint it before I install the cabinets and have to paint around them. And since I had everything down to paint it I thought well, we should just get new hardware that I'll actually like instead of the generic builder stuff we have now. And since the room is already a mess, why don't I just paint the bottom cabinet too? 
So I did. Last weekend we finished the master bathroom painting of the walls and bottom cabinet and installation of hardware and then ordering of new hardware and of course the installation of the medicine cabinet that started this whole mess to begin with. Now is all about the finishing touches which is taking me even longer than all the other stuff put together. I just wanna get it right so I've been ordering accessories left and right and returning them left and right because I just wanna knock it all out and you can't just put the same old stuff you had in here to begin with otherwise it won't feel like a makeover. At least, that's what I think.
So until I finish all the other accessorizing, here's the medicine cabinet that caused this mess to begin with! Ikea struck me again because I bought the wrong size and didn't realize until I had unboxed and assembled both of them and then measured them and realized, wait, that's not right. So we ended up with one in the center which actually works out great I just wish I'd have been more careful than to trust myself in the Swede world because I'd have done things differently.
 Even after all these years and myself an expert, UGH!

Monday, May 4, 2015

on the nights when you just don't want to be mom

It's Sunday night and until May 17, it's Mad Men night at the Fredrich household which is when new episodes air of the show I've been following for 7 years. I've been home for a month not really planned but Alice and I have been glued at the hip the whole time which is great but tonight I just wanted to make myself a cocktail, watch the show, and then watch old episodes of the same show alone in my office and just for a few hours basically... not be mom.

I put Alice to bed every night at 8 but she was really cranky and rubbing her eyes around 7 when the show starts so Matt, knowing I wanted to hang with the employees of Sterling Cooper & Partners, put her down for the night. Or so we thought.

She woke up a few more times and each time I went in there I would rock her to sleep and put her in her crib and as soon as knew she was being put down in the crib she would wake up and start crying and then become hysterical. I could tell she was exhausted but she was doing everything she could to keep herself awake and force her eyes that were dropping to remain open. Willing herself not to sleep. The daily battle we have with our daughter. I wish she could just be laid down and sleep but it's a battle for every nap except the ones where she's in a car seat as our car is moving. It's gotten increasingly difficult as she's gotten older to get her to fall asleep for her naps. Thankfully once she does she usually naps for a long time and we've been lucky that she sleeps all night most nights but getting those long eyelashes to meet her cheeks is a fight worthy of pay per view.

I went in there the last time and tried to pat her as she lay there but she was up in moments and she stood there holding onto the crib and I stood there over her, my arms wide and defiant, hands on the crib slat as she stood there whimpering. "I will not pick her up" "She's gotta stay there." And then she reached her little hand up to me and tugged on my shirt and looked up at me pleading for her momma to pick her up. Tears in both our eyes I did. I rocked her one more time and laid her down with her heavy but still open eyes before I walked back into the office again to watch her on the monitor (as I am still doing) keep popping her head up and sitting up and refusing to just go to sleep.

On any other day I would go in there time and time again to rock her to sleep without much complaint but tonight, just for tonight, I just didn't want to be mom.